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Often a tour is more memorable for incidents off the pitch rather than on it, however in 2005 these incidents were not alcohol related, or curry related but cleaniness related. The Superstars themselves are willing to slum it on tour, the guests may be less so, but this hotel although undeniably cheap was the pits for hygene. In fact it is rumoured that one of the party reported the hotel to Health and Safety - quite understandly. Still what doesn't kill us makes us stronger I guess! When asked for 'Nam style flashbacks with a Marlon Brandon voiceover saying "the horror, the horror" the players who felt able to discuss the hotel's state spoke exclusively to with the following harrowing accounts-
"The floor in our bedroom was so uneven that if you walked from one side of the room to the other it was like being on a rollercoaster ride. It just went up and down all over the place. The carpet had been laid in '05 that's 1905 not 2005 it was that old and dirty. The window sill in the room was totally coated in cigarette ash and dead flies so that it couldn't have been cleaned for months if years. We had to borrow the pubs Hoover and spent about 2 hours cleaning the room ourself." said one Superstar who did not want to be named, so we're calling them Jason Marchant to protect his identity.
"I can only describe what was in the kettle, and those familiar with the washing-up scene from the Richard E Grant/Paul McGann film "Withnail & I" will know what I'm talking about, as 'matter'. This, coupled with the amazing smell of cooking oil and fag ash as you passed the kitchen to the upstairs accommodation, made it something I'll never forget." said Will Walker crying into a kettle.
Friday Night - No match
The usual curry on Friday night (following the oppo's late cry off) with the highlight being Ken kissing a rather large Alsatian dog.
2005 Tour 2005 Tour
Saturday - Train Ride and Ashcott & Shapwick
Barry and Jason got to go into the cab of the steam engine. It was unbelievably hot stood in that cab and Jason had to drag Barry off the engine as he wouldn't get off; presumably he was just trying to warm his legs up!
Ashcott & Shapwick were (and probably still are) a pretty decent outfit who made us toil somewhat in the field and ended up beating us pretty comfortably although Superstars got close and cetainly gained credibility.
Ashcott & Shapwick 169 ao (Gundry 3-24, Kamellard 3-28, Taylor 2-24, Walker 2-32)
Superstars 157-6 (McBarron 35, Priest 35, Walker 27, Gundry 0) Superstars Lost by 12 runs
Sunday - Wookey Indians
Their batting relied on one player who just smashed us all over the park for 100 and boy could he hit the ball. Once he was out they didn't have any real batsmen to hold the innings together. Simon and Will scored well to bring the win home.
We played skittles with them at the local pub afterwards and much to our amusement Steve 'the Kingpin' Meyler kept missing all the pins. The skittles match was great and the Thatchers Farmer's Tipple cider (7.9ABV) was pretty special too. They were such a nice friendly bunch that we arranged to play them again when we went on tour in 2006.
Superstars 173-5 (Gundry 58, Walker 56 no, Meyler 10 - run out by his runner Carter by at least 10 yards!)
Wookey Indians 129 ao (Block 4-10, Gundry 5-2-4-1, Marchant 1-1) Superstars Won by 44 runs but lost at skittles later. Great bunch want us back next year, also presented us with a signed shirt!
Monday - South Petherton
South Petherton was a rather tough match as they had some keen youngsters who were limbering up for the season with some rather unnecessary sledging. They scored well over 200 (having reversed the order)and we were about 10-4 before they realised that as a touring side we were not as good as they expected (and were rather unpleasant when Steve turned down an appeal for caught behind - which considering it was "walker" (sic) Barry can't have been out. We were all shattered and we were being taken to pieces by the oppo who kept hitting the ball into the tennis court next to the ground. I remember in that game the ball dribbling really slowly towards Simon and he didn't move just stood there and waited for it to come to a stop about a yard away from him before slowly bending over and bowling it slowly back underarm. He was either totally exhausted or had just about had enough. It should have been a quick single but they might have run three lol. I think because of injuries most of us had played in all the games we were all knackered. Nice weather though. Hollland had previously toured there and they moaned that we didn't spend much in the bar as most of us trooped back home rather than spend another night in the 'hovel'.
South Petherton 224-7 (Block 3-34 Conway/Marchant 6-0-45-0)
Superstars 89ao (Conway, Priest, Carr all 20, Marchant golden) Superstars Lost by 135 runs! Very professional outfit + we looked very knackered.
Player of the Tour: Will Walker
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Related Links
2005 Hovel Tour Gallery
2005 Results
2005 Stats
2005 AGM
Barry's 100no v DCMS
English Heritage Video June 2005
English Heritage Video July 2005
2005 History
Wookey Indians CC
Other Tours
2013 Hampshire Tour
2012 Dampshire Tour
2011 Bedfordshire Tour
2009 Cotswolds Tour
2008 Hertfordshire Tour
2007 Cotswolds Tour
2006 Somerset Tour
2005 Somerset 'Hovel' Tour
2004 Yorkshire Tour
2003 Newcastle 'Corporate Games' Tour
2003 Hertfordshire Tour
2002 Kent Coast Tour
2001 Yorkshire Tour
2000 Wales Tour
1999 Worcestershire Tour
1998 North Devon Tour
1997 Yorkshire Tour
1996 Lancashire Tour